Because I Said So

It is easy to spot a mother of a toddler; she is the one with smoke coming out of her ears.

As funny as that sounds, some days honestly feel that way. Most mornings, in my quiet time, I start off by jokingly telling the Lord to just hit the high points on where I blew it as a mother the day before.

At Eva’s first pediatric appointment, her doctor looked at Chuck and I and said, “Have you both read the latest book on parenting?” Chuck and I looked at each other and said, “No?” To this, she replied, “Good, Eva hasn’t read it either.” We chuckled at the truth of her statement.

Children do not come with an instruction manual. I wish I could turn to page 237 of the “EVA JEWEL MANUAL” and have it laid out for me “step by step” directions as to how I am supposed to handle things like socks between her toes, snagged pieces of hair caught in her hairbows, or irritating crinkles in the seat belt when it is latched. So many finicky things that are unique to each child makes a mother wonder how to handle each one?

There are days that are an endless stream of questions filled with why. I kind of feel like Andy Griffith when he looked down at Opie and said, “And to think I was happy when you learned to talk.”

I remember one day, I was correcting Eva over something she could not understand. She was whining, and I had my angry face on, as she likes to call it. As I was trying to explain to her something beyond her years of understanding, I paused and recalled something Chuck often says to me, “We do not negotiate with toddlers.”

At that moment, I looked down and said, “Eva Jewel, the reason is simple…BECAUSE I SAID SO.” I told her the matter was closed, and if the whining continued, a firm hand would be applied to the seat of knowledge. It took a few minutes, but she knew I would follow through with my word.

Later that day, Eva asked me if I still had my angry face on? I laughed and told her no. I explained that mommies don’t keep angry faces on for very long, but sometimes it takes crinkled eyebrows and a long pointer finger to teach hard lessons.

Parenting is not for the faint of heart. It can feel like a constant battle of second-guessing yourself, but when obedience follows where disobedience once was, glimmers of hope shine through.

As a child, I was not thankful at all for my parent’s discipline, but today it leads me when correcting Eva.

Proverbs 29:17 says, “Discipline your children and they will give you peace, they will bring you delights you desire.” I have found this to be so true. Correct discipline done privately will show up publicly.

In 1 Chronicles 13:11, there is an interesting story that takes place. To paraphrase, David has gone to bring back the Ark of the Covenant to Jerusalem. In transporting the ark, they had a brilliant idea. They would place the ark on a cart. After all, it made more sense to do it this way. With all their modern conveniences, this was more practical than the way God had commanded it to be carried, which was upon the Priest’s shoulders. The oxen that were pulling the cart stumbled. So, a man named Uzza reached out his hand to steady the ark. God struck him dead instantly. David became angry with God; it didn’t matter that his own intellectual decisions got Uzza killed. The blame had to be pinned somewhere, and God fit the bill.

Had David transported the Ark of the Covenant the way God commanded, he would have avoided the whole incident. God, however, is unmoved. He doesn’t even acknowledge David’s outburst, nor does he explain to him his reasons why.

How many times have I taken matters into my own hands instead of handling correction the way God intended me to do?

Love operates within the confines of boundaries. There will be times the only answer I can give will be the same one God outlined here in this story. Hidden between the lines are the words so plainly seen… BECAUSE I SAID SO.

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“Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right” Ephesians 6:1

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