Different Spills

I have been told many times by those who now have empty nests to enjoy every season of raising kids; it all goes too fast. I would have to agree with them. People seem to miss those young years and relive them when they see young mothers chasing after a little one.

A new found friend told me a couple of weeks back that it sure is quiet when they’re all grown up. She told me to make sure I grew with my kids, so I didn’t get left behind. I logged that advice away for safekeeping.

There is a particular day that comes to mind, that I found myself overcome with pride towards those “toddler years.” I had taken Eva to play at an indoor play park, and while I watched Eva slide, I politely struck up some small talk with another mother standing there. She was holding in her hand a portable potty for her two-year-old to use in a public setting. That should have been my first clue to walk away but thinking I would appear rude I held on, but the more she talked, the more I wanted to escape.

She started right in telling me how advanced her two-year-old was, then she asked me what homemade learning tools I had made for my child and how she was developing?

I slowly turned my head with raised eyebrows and watched Eva slide head-first down a gigantic slide while this lady’s child sat at the top screaming at her mother.

I looked back at the mother with a sly grin on my face and said something off the cuff like, “I haven’t made any learning tools for Eva, mainly I just let her slide headfirst into things.” Although we do spend time talking and learning together, as do most, she wouldn’t have heard me.

After much playing and watching my little girl just be a kid, I told her it was time to go. As we turned to leave, this lady’s advanced two-year-old stood up on the slide and tee-teed. To this, I jokingly responded, “Uh-oh, looks like she missed the portable potty.” “Have a good day!”

Each season will bring its own challenges, from the newborn who is simply relying on you for everything, to the toddler who is declaring their independence. I can remember the first time I loaded Eva up by myself to go to town. I was so nervous I didn’t even know how to buckle her in the carseat. Now, each day seems to slip by faster and faster. Yet, there are still days I have to remind myself that Chuck will be home at five o’clock, and I can then lock myself in the closet.

A few weeks ago, I had taken Eva up to my folks for a visit. We were around the breakfast table in utter chaos. Five different conversations were going on at once. Ben, my nephew, had just gotten up from the table and was running the hallway with some toy. Eva was mad because she had to eat a few more bites before being excused, and I was still politely nodding and acting as if I was in one of the conversations going on. I finally looked up while wiping off Eva’s hands and said in a loud voice, “Don’t you miss these toddler years and all the clean-ups?” Mom and Dad kind of laughed, followed by Dad saying with a chuckle, “Oh Sis, they don’t ever go away. It’s just different spills.”

I have never known spills to be anything but inconvenient, but it is in my response to the mess that will teach Eva the most. She is going to learn one of two things; 1) Mommy will always clean it up or 2) She will learn to clean it up with my supervision.

As Eva is getting older, I have noticed her beginning to take responsibility for her own spills. She runs for the paper towels and begins to clean up the mess all on her own. When she is finished and has moved on, I come behind and help clean up where she missed, but the fact that she is trying gives glistens of maturity. The interesting takeaway is the next time she sets her glass down, it isn’t as close to the edge as it used to be.

In Eva’s two-year old days, there were accidents if we didn’t make it to the potty in time. It was bothersome to clean up to say the least. But more so, uncomfortable for her. She quickly learned to hold it (and I got faster).

There will be different spills to clean up as Eva grows, but if Chuck and I clean up all of her messes, she will never learn to move the glass off the edge of the table.

God is the same way. He is always looking out for us. He will even come behind us and clean up the parts we miss.

Good parenting starts with removing the potty from the public setting and leading your child to the restroom. We must teach them how to grow up. It’s inconvenient and will wreck our perfect lives, but the success of our children lies within the spills.

Welcome Home

“The Lord is gracious, slow to anger and abounding in mercy….For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy towards them that fear him.” Psalms 145:8

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My apologies for last weeks blog mishap. It posted one day early causing some confusion, If you did not receive it, you can go look under “Paint the Dragons Red” and find it. Thank you for your continued support of my writing. Blessings – Kristen Howard

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