He needs no introduction. I hope you enjoy an excerpt from my father’s journal this week. We are growing something in our children. What they produce largely will be determined by the parents.
I’m thanking God for choosing the Stockdale family in which to place a tiny baby named James M. Stockdale, Jr. He was born into a church-attending family. It is a family of one father and one mother. There is already an older sister, and there will be a younger brother. This little baby is placed into the care of a family with a patriarch who is a pastor and a matriarch who understands the importance of modesty and holy living. The grandparents on both sides speak the truth, live honestly, and work diligently to provide for their families.
As I consider the beginning Father God gave me, I think of a tiny fruit tree. What chance would it have if cast into the deep woods where no one can tend it? By some galactic glitch, a passing bunny may occasionally drop a few smart pills around its roots to provide the fertilizer needed to grow. But what chance would this little tree have if overshadowed by mighty oaks and hickories during its formative years? By the same consideration, this little tree, if placed in a garden spot, where it would receive attention from the gardener and sunlight from above, along with the occasional rain shower, how would it grow and what would it produce?
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Tall and straight as an arrow, with a lot of fruit in its future, could be the prediction for such a tree. A drive through the deep southern states of the Carolinas, Florida, Georgia, and Alabama will give you a picture of what I’m talking about. There are acres and acres of young fruit trees that produce nothing. They are growing in rows of intentionality but have yet to create a single bite of fruit. Why did the farmer plant them in the way that he did? Why does this farmer continue to care for them the way he does? Why would he “waste his time” on immature trees? Because he knows that someday, these small trees will become a mature, fruit-producing orchard that can guarantee a hungry planet has fresh fruit.
I gave thanks to the Father today for the sound of running water dripping from my leaves and the sound of a fertilizer spreader as it passes through the garden. Likewise, thank you for the sound of leather passing through polyester and the lessons its extraction taught me. Thank you for the smell of supper cooking on the stove and the words, “Daddy’s home!” Some would ask, “Is home life really that important?” Or, “Does it matter if I make my children perform menial tasks and obey instructions while expecting results and enforcing compliance?” I say yes!
The difference is seen in that small tree planted in a garden or forest. There is a chance that an occasional miracle could produce fruit from a tree left to its own devices, yet how much more significant is the expectancy of that which is planted with intentionality and designed for greatness by a loving gardener?
As a parent, you are solely responsible for overseeing your child’s future. You’re not just changing diapers and making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches; you’re producing fruit that will remain. A mother and father who faithfully tend to the development of their children are stewards of the future. As you teach your child the essentials of love, obedience, respect, truth, and honesty, you teach them how to succeed in a future where you will likely have to live.
The lessons reinforced by discipline and responsibility pave a highway to the sun that can carry them forward unchecked by washouts and with waypoints clearly marked for them to follow. How do you want that future to look? Plant today, and enjoy tomorrow. Be a parent, and someday you’ll be a friend. Don’t try to be both – Allow time to process the changes that will come. No one will have to tell you when you’ve transitioned from parent to friend. You’ll know, as will they.
Jim Stockdale
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