I could feel the wind passing by me as if it were going the same speed as I was, only in the opposite direction. My hair was flying behind me, trying to hang on. My tears were being pulled from my eyes, and the parked cars were racing past me like a toy race-car track. At seven years old, this was not a good setup.
It was a quiet side road, and our family was out for an afternoon bike ride a few miles from our own neighborhood. I was trying out a new bike with the braking system on the handlebars. The hill was steeper than I had thought as I started down it. There was no turning back. I was wide-open before I could change my mind. Mom and Dad were on an old two-seater bike (why I do not know…so it is probably better if you don’t even ask why…), and Brittney was on her little bike. Dad quickly told mom to jump off, and he raced down the hill trying to catch me. I remember him fearfully yelling, “Press the brakes on the handlebars!” But fear and speed kept me from understanding how to do that. I peddled backward, trying to make the bike stop, but with no avail. I just kept gaining speed. There was an oncoming car approaching me rather quickly. Thankfully, the driver realized there was a problem and stopped. I began to lose control at top-notch speed. I met the asphalt with my knees, elbows, and shoulders. It was quite a wreck. This popular fireside story initiates the same response from my folks each time. They were in a place of helplessness to assist me, causing their hearts to sink.
Even with the practice my father had shown me in the safety of our own driveway, a quiet street was no match for the steepness of the hill… or the speed. I forgot all the training when freedom was given.
Back then helmets, elbow and knee pads were not common. Although, in a few situations, I can understand safety gear, but in most cases, it is just not necessary. The absence of scrapes and bruises makes the first punch of life a knock-out.
Eva, who is four, has nearly rode the training wheels off her bicycle. Chuck told me it was time to take them off and let her try to balance without them. I, being the protective and ever-caring mother that I am, said passionately, “Absolutely not!” Four years old was too young for her to learn balance without us beside her, but one look at my husband’s face told me I was not going to win this one. Looking over at the tattered training wheels on her bike, I realized, one way or the other, the training wheels were coming off.
Chuck started slowly, working with her in the yard, teaching her how to balance and how to stop. Even though it was the same braking system with the training wheels off, somehow, it seemed impossible to her. She caught the balance part right away, but the breaks were another story. Adults are a lot the same way. We juggle all we can, making a balancing act out of our daily lives, but then we forget where the breaks are located.
Chuck, being the patient man that he is, would balance her on the bike and teach her to break with him walking beside her. Feeling confident with daddy close beside her, it wasn’t long before she was riding all by herself and stopping on command. One day, she told me she wanted to start at the top of our driveway and do it all by herself, including… the stop. Flashbacks of catastrophe flooded my mind, but I remembered the look in my husband’s eyes as he took those training wheels off. He believed in her; it was my turn to do the same. Racing down the hill, balancing like a champion, she came sailing around the corner, smiling and squealing! She slid to a stop as if there was nothing to it. I beamed with pride and yelled with excitement! She did it.
That evening, I sat pondering the events of the day. My heart was so full as I thought about my little girl conquering more independence right before my eyes. How does that happen? I wanted to keep her locked down to those training wheels, but I realized trapping her in my own protection would only suffocate the life out of her. Once again, my job as a parent was presenting itself. In some ways, parents have to remove their own training wheels or get left behind.
I know there will be times crashes will occur; this is inevitable. There are going to be some scrapes and bruises, but just as my father was there to pick me up, I know Chuck will be right there to show Eva how to try again. Balance and stopping are the two most important concepts we can teach our children. Without this awareness in place, all the padding in the world will not equip or brace them for the crash that is coming.
Training wheels were made to be temporary protection in the training process, not a permanent adaptation. My skin is tougher, my head is level and my heart is softer because of the scrapes and bruises I have received learning how to balance.
Our children will not break. Let them fall then watch them fly.
Welcome Home
“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6
If you are enjoying these posts please LIKE, SHARE, and SUBSCRIBE below!
