You will never be able to chase the right man away.
Love, Mom
When I was young, our church performed a play called “Coming Home.” There were two characters in the play named Edith and Earl. They were married and had a dialogue scene between them where Edith asks Earl why he never tells her he loves her? Earl responds with, “Edith, I told you when we got married that I loved you, if I change my mind, you will be the first to know.”
This line crosses my mind when I aim for love comments from Chuck. Sometimes I tease him by asking deep questions about love, knowing it will put him on the spot. I get similar remarks just like Edith did. Other times, I will go on and on with an entire story and he will respond with, one-word remarks. After a few slow blinks from my facial expression, he will elaborate deeper by adding a few more words to his sentence as if that just changed the caliber of depth by leaps and bounds.
Where talking may not be his forte, detail is. Chuck doesn’t miss much. He is kind of like our German Shepherd. He sees everything but says very little until needed. I can go days between a passing thought that I have uttered out loud and the resolve to figure it out. Yet, if it is within Chuck’s power to produce a solution, he will do it. The other day was no exception. My rose bushes were dying because I accidentally sprayed the wrong chemical spray on them (I know). Each day they were browning more and more. I was trying everything to save them. The next thing I know, Chuck had purchased a rose chemical treatment to bring them back to life. He saw my struggle and looked for a way to help me, not with many words; but with action only.
There was a time, back when Chuck and I were dating, that I decided he was not the man for me. I was confused about my own plans and decided ridding myself of any further complications would help me figure out what it was I wanted. Some time had passed and he called. He asked if he could come talk to me. I agreed. We talked for several hours. One thing I distinctly remember telling him was that I was looking for a family man; a man like my dad. A man that could fix anything, pray for everything and work tirelessly. He looked at me and said, “I am that man and I’m going to prove it to you.”
As the years have gone by, a single thought will invade my thinking on routine days when nothing unusual is happening. Sometimes the thought comes when we load up each Sunday for church chasing our coattails and Bibles out the door. Other times the thought whispers quietly when I watch him head off to work without a thought to the Monday morning blues. Then there are times the thought peeps through when I see him disappear headfirst under the kitchen sink to fix a leaky pipe or catch him disassembling the shower nozzle to stop the water that is pouring in from behind the shower wall. Or perhaps it’s when I stare wide-eyed while he shoots a deer off our back porch and spends his free time killing the ever-pesky snake that slithers out of the creek, trying to invade our space; but mainly the thought comes when I appreciate the life he has carved out for his family, even to his own hurt at times. It’s the simple words my mother told me so many years ago, “You can’t chase the right man away.”
The other evening, I caught Eva sneaking out of her bath. She had her clothes in hand and she was tip-toeing down the hallway, leaving wet footprints as she went. I leaned up against the wall and asked her where she was off to? She turned around and said, “Please Mommy, Daddy is in the garden about to do the miracle grow and I’m going to miss it!” My heart melted. I bent down and quickly helped her put on her clothes then I told her to hurry up, she didn’t want to miss the best part. She ran out the door yelling, “Daddy, wait for me, I’m coming!”
My heart is elated that in a pivotal moment in my life, I took a chance on this man; a family man. He truly has never failed to deliver on his promise to be the man that I needed in my life. He keeps me grounded when I would fly off course in the wrong direction. He tells me to take a chance when I would otherwise never make a move. He comes to my rescue as “Mr. Fix It” and transforms into my Prince when all is quiet. Flowers find their way to our house regularly, for no other reason other than I crossed his mind while he was picking up pickles from the store. He is my patience when I seem to have lost my own and my strong arm of security when I feel my knees start to shake.
The doubt of ever finding a family man is laid to rest each night as I leave Eva’s room. He doesn’t know it, but I can hear her asking him all kinds of questions. I sit there and listen as he calms all her concerns, kisses her goodnight, and leaves her sleeping soundly.
What more could I have been looking for all those years ago? After all, He told me he loved me when we got married and he has never changed his mind.
Welcome Home
P.S. Don’t forget to tell your “family man” how much he means to you. They’re a rare find.
“Look how good and pleasing it is when families live together as one.” Psalms 133:1
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