“Then it happened one evening that David arose from his bed and walked on the roof of the king’s house and from the roof, he saw a woman bathing, and the woman was very beautiful to behold…So David sent and inquired about this woman. And someone said, ‘Is this not Bathsheba, the daughter of the Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?’ Then David sent messengers and took her, and she came to him…” 2 Samuel 11:1-4.
My mother is a beautiful lady. She always keeps herself well-dressed and put together, including her nails. She feels it is essential to keep up a lovely appearance. How we take care of ourselves directly reflects who we are.
My father is a handsome man; he pulls off the aged rugged cowboy look very well (he will like that part). Working hard outside during his life has left its mark as nothing else can. He never was one to let a joke pass him by, even when the weather of South Dakota was windy, hot, and dry. I remember one day we were all outside mowing the grass. We looked up to find Dad mowing in blue jean shorts, boots, and his cowboy hat. I could hear my mother shouting, “Jim!” He looked so funny! He would then sarcastically say, “Girls, this is why your mother finds me irresistible.” My sister and I would giggle, and mom would comically roll her eyes.
Mom and Dad had a rule between the two of them. Openly and privately. It was a simple rule- Never Look Twice- For it is in the second look that we become ensnared.
There are things in our lives that will flash before us faster than we can think, but what we allow to linger will directly impact our decisions. It is like the old saying, “You can’t keep a bird from flying overhead, but you can keep the bird from building a nest.”
Although David should have shielded his eyes, turned away, and not looked at Bathsheba again, he didn’t do that. The Bible says in 2 Samuel 11:4, “That David sent messengers and took her and she came to him.” He desired a second look and gave in.
I can remember a time when a beautiful lady walked past my folks while they were in a hardware store. My mom made a polite comment about her beauty. Dad looked at mom and said, “I didn’t look twice.”
When my sister and I married, Mom made sure we both understood that it was crucial to understanding second looks’ importance. She would say, “No matter where you are, be courteous and polite but always move away as quickly as you can.”
Relationships are just one area where we need to guard our eyes: media, pictures, books, people, and purchases. I tell Eva, and it will hold for Charlotte as well, “You have the power to stop looking at anything that is not appropriate. No matter what it is. If it offers up a red flag to your heart, do not ignore the warning.”
What is allowed into our eyes and ears will make its way to our hearts if we are not very careful. “Guard your heart with all diligence. For out of it flows the issues of life,” Proverbs 4:23. The more we allow unsuitable materials in our minds, the easier it becomes the next time to look or to listen. We become desensitized to it. God’s presence dwells on the inside of every Christian. What we allow inside our minds will either soften or harden our hearts towards him. It is in the second look that brings addictions, hasty decisions, wrong purchases, and mistakes.
I can remember a big purchase my folks would make when I was a little girl. Mom was so excited to have a new car, but dad wanted to sleep on it. They had a price ceiling for significant decisions. Anything over a certain amount they slept on it. After a good night’s sleep and a clear conscience, they purchased the car. They put many miles on it, but not one mile was marked with regret.
Take my parent’s forty-one years of experience; wisdom comes in the waiting. Mistakes come with the second look.
Welcome Home
“Sin lies at the door, and its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.” Genesis 4:7
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