Finding Normal
Pouring a steaming hot cup of tea and stirring in a little honey with cream starts the day off with utter satisfaction. Heading to my morning spot in the living room I walk past my planner. Taking a glance to see what the day entails keeps me laughing. Most days I think, “Who wrote this stuff!”
Smart moms have a plan, even if the aspirations are not always achieved; we still aim high for each day. We always have a scheme to uncover little hidden agendas and a plan of action on plotting out how to use the next fifteen minutes to run the bathwater, water the flowers, and clean up the arts and crafts all while installing new batteries in the newest toy and receiving the latest UPS package with the one free hand that we have. IT’S WHAT WE DO!
Scheduling Doctor’s appointments, making sure bills get paid on time, organizing the family trip, and keeping the bathrooms stocked with toilet paper are real-life occurrences. But what strikes me as odd is how I can clean the house, make lunches, put away laundry, and get the family dressed for the day, but when it comes to myself, well, it seems I get caught in the shuffle. Inserting note to self here: Putting your clothes on backwards or forgetting essential clothing pieces does not score points towards selflessness. That’s just plain absentminded! Or perhaps for us mothers we just “found normal.”
Mothers know everything, supposedly. We don’t even have to be in the same room and we know the proximity of our children. Finding dried cheese and feathers stuck together on Eva’s art table makes the typical detective questions of who, what, where, when, and how come alive. Who did this? What was I doing? Where was I?! When did this happen? How did this get past me?
I heard it said that “Cleaning up after children is like trying to shovel your driveway while it is still snowing.” I feel strongly this is a daily occurrence for me even at eighty-five degrees, which I am not complaining about.
Nighttime Potty Training is not for the faint of heart. A few months ago, we were knee-deep in this very thing. Eva had almost arrived at full completion. Chuck and I were taking shifts while she was learning to wake up during the night. The days had rolled into weeks and we were both quite exhausted. No matter your shift with little ones, your sleep is interrupted at best. Those afternoon red lights, when coming through traffic, take on a whole new meaning.
One night, I could barely keep my eyes open so I went to bed early. I was lost in a deep sleep coma when I awoke to the sight of Eva staring at me. I thought she had gotten up on her own to head for the potty. I threw the covers back in a fury, jumped out of bed like a rocket, and proceeded to get my robe, lounge pants, and house shoes put on- in the dark! All the while saying, “I’m up, I’m up!” I got her no problem!” “I’m up!”
I turned the corner headed for the door and saw Chuck standing in the doorway, fully clothed, staring at me with his head slightly tilted. Through my haze, I could not figure out why he was up and still fully dressed? He snickered, “It is only eleven-thirty. What are you doing?” I just stood there half-awake, tying my robe, trying to make sense of what just happened. He erupted with, “STAND DOWN SOLDIER!”
It took us about an hour to regain composure from the laughter that encompassed the scene. He went on to say that he had never seen anyone get out of bed quite like that before. He wasn’t sure but he thought my midsection never moved, it just looked like I caught air somehow from underneath the bed and catapulted out.
Normal life looks different after having kids, dried cheese stuck to feathers seems like a perfectly natural finding. Life becomes richer. It’s in finding the normal that brings back the fondness of your childhood and you get to repeat the good parts all over again while making your own mistakes.
“If you get married only for what you can get out of it, you’re eventually going to hate marriage and if you have kids only for what they can give to you, instead of what you can do for them- you will hate being a parent too.” Joe McGee
God made us to serve others. It is in serving that we become great. Not necessarily known, but great in the eyes of those that matter most to us.
So, when you’re looking through your planner and you can’t seem to find normal anywhere, look again, it’s written in the bubbles spilled all over the table, in the playroom door you slowly creak closed, and in the deep sighs you breathe as another day has safely been tucked away in the crevices of time and in the unmarked list of “To Do’s” that never got done. Sleep well, tomorrow awaits….
Welcome Home
“Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” Matthew 6:26
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